Life With Possessions

Six years ago, after my father passed away after a three month illness, I had a brief epiphany.

It happened like this. After the funeral, I went back to work for a few months before I was able to return to spend a week at his house—the house I grew up in—sorting through things and trying to get the place ready for someone else.

This was where my family resided for forty-seven years. Nearly fifty years in the life of our family was successfully layered there, as my mother saved things—Christmas cards from old friends over the years, receipts for major purchases, Life Magazine issues from major events like the Apollo Moon missions. She wasn’t a hoarder like the people we see on reality shows these days. But she did want some record for some imagined future. As I worked, I slowed down. Some things were impossible to get rid of--after my sister died in a car accident, for example, her room had remained her room, and many of her dresses from high school were still there. 

After my mother died, my dad didn't really want to get rid of her stuff either.

The house was small, too. As I sorted, I began to wonder about all of what I was going through, and then I realized something about my own possessions.

I had more than enough. And some day, if things didn’t change, I would be gone and my kids would be sorting through my stuff.

I decided then that I had a choice to make. I had spent a life accumulating things. What if I were to spend the next thirty years getting rid of things? What if I stopped getting birthday presents and Christmas presents? What if I spent birthdays bringing my stuff to Good Will or giving it away—the stuff that was still good?

I might find myself in my eighties, if I live that long, with an empty little apartment.

I decided to begin my backward movement.I left things behind.I finally understood why some people had garage sales.

But it didn’t last long. I tried for a few weeks, but then I had to take all the stuff we decided to save from my dad’s house, and that sits in our house now with all of our junk.

But I’m still thinking about it. What isn’t going to matter? What is worth keeping, and what should I get rid of?

I’m working on it, and I still accept presents, of course.